MARCH IS SCIENCE GONE MAD MONTH!!!!
Doctor Doom is about as "mad science-y" as you can get! A February 1964 cover by Jack Kirby.
COMICS, OLD-TIME RADIO and OTHER COOL STUFF: Random Thoughts about pre-digital Pop Culture, covering subjects such as pulp fiction, B-movies, comic strips, comic books and old-time radio. WRITTEN BY TIM DEFOREST. EDITED BY MELVIN THE VELOCIRAPTOR. New content published every Monday, Wednesday, Thursday & Friday.
MARCH IS SCIENCE GONE MAD MONTH!!!!
Doctor Doom is about as "mad science-y" as you can get! A February 1964 cover by Jack Kirby.
Suspense: "Short Order" 8/16/45
A hideously deformed man becomes a regular customer at a diner, which begins driving away the other customers.
Click HERE to listen or download.
Because of Laptop Trouble (I needed a new power cord, but I suspect Skynet was behind it), I'm behind in creating posts. I'm afraid there will be no Wednesday or Thursday posts this week.
The Adventures of the Saint: "Nursemaid" 7/15/51
Simon is hired to convince a young lady not to date a gangster. Unsurprisingly, he ends up having to solve a murder.
Click HERE to listen or download.
The first eight Reeder stories were collected in The Mind of J.G. Reeder in 1925, published in England. In the U.S., the book was retitled The Murder Book of J.G. Reeder, with the individual stories sometimes retitled and arranged in a different order. Title changes, of course, are done by editors who think a new title is catchier for their specific audience. I have no idea why the stories were re-ordered, though the tales are self-contained enough not to matter.
The first story in Richie Rich and Dollar the Dog (September 1977), by an unidentified creative team, includes an important PSA for all dog owners. If you are ever rehearsing a play in which you play a bad guy who dislikes dogs, MAKE SURE your dog doesn't hear you and take the dialogue out of context. This won't end well. It's what happens when Richie's dog Dollar (a dollarmation, of course) overhears Richie and his friend Freckles doing just this.
I don't care how silly the above images are--if you own a dog, this is a heartbreaking scene.
Dollar runs away and begins hitchhiking. He's picked up by a pair of gangster, who by now has heard the news that Dollar is missing and that there's a huge reward. But bad guys are bad guys. Rather than settle for just the reward the Rich family is offering, they come up with a complex plan to smuggle Dollar out of the country the statue of a horse, sell him to a rare animal dealer, THEN tell the Rich family where he is to collect THAT reward.
The horse with Dollar inside is loaded on a plane, but the pilots hear Dollar barking and immediately land again. Dollar makes a break for it.
The gangsters spot him and give chase. Fortunately, Dollar runs into the local school in his attempt to get away, where that play is currently being performed. Richie and Freckles take care of the gangsters (and, wow, does Richie pack a powerful gut punch!), Dollar finally understands that Richie doesn't hate him and everyone is happy. Well, everyone except the gangsters. They get arrested.
It is a silly story, but it's fun. And, by golly, if you own a dog, the story will become an emotional roller-coaster. It can't be helped.
Next week, we return to The Mighty Hercules.
Fibber McGee and Molly: "Fibber Buys a New Suit and Steals a Hat" 2/4/41
McGee needs a new suit, so he and Molly head to the store. What could possibly go wrong?
Click HERE to listen or download.
It continues to be a universal truth: No matter how familiar one is with pulp magazine authors, you will regularly stumble over one you hadn't heard of before and discover he or she was quite a good storyteller.
For instance, I just read "The Coming of the Ice," by G. Peyton Wortenbaker, published in the June 1926 issue of Amazing Stories. It was the magazine's third issue and was still relying on reprinting classics and stories first published in other pulps to fill the pages. Aside from Wells and Verne, Otis Adlebert Kline and Murray Leinster each had a story included that were reprinted from Weird Tales and Argosy respectively.
But editor Hugo Gernsback was beginning to see original science fiction showing up in his mail box. "The Coming of the Ice" is, in fact, the first original SF story that appears in the magazine. And Wortenbacker, darn him, was only 19 years old when he wrote it.
The first person narrator is friends with a scientist who has accidentally stumbled over the secret of immortality. It involves an operation that will ensure you never physically die, but will have your emotions deadened. Despite this flaw, the narrator and his girlfriend both choose to give it a go.
The narrator goes first and the operation is a success. Then the scientist and the girl are killed in a car accident before she has the procedure.
The narrator, by the way, is telling us this in the far future--hundreds of thousands or perhaps millions of years from now. He's lost count. His story of living on through the centuries as mankind evolves around him--becoming physically weaker but mentally stronger--is filled with melancholy. Those around him gradually forget about the past, concentrating only on the future.
So when a second Ice Age gradually engulfs the Earth, it catches humanity by surprise and the narrator is the only person fit enough to survive.
This is a great story--hitting just the right note of melancholy to make it work and even injecting a small measure of hope in at the end. It's worth reading and can be found online HERE.
The last story (not counting a 1-page text about olive oil) in The Mighty Hercules #1 (July 1963), also written by Paul S. Newman and drawn by an uncredited artist, shows us that Hercules is a bit of a scaredy-cat.
The nation of Calydon is being invaded. The gates of the city are closed and Helena calls out for Hercules. But Herk's arch-enemy, the wizard Daedalus, offers his services to the invaders in exchange for a share of the loot.
When Hercules arrives, it at first seems that the demi-god will have little trouble dispatching the invaders. But Daedalus casts a spell on him to make him thirsty. Hercules then unwisely takes a drink from the Waters of Illusion. Now everything he seees will appear to be a monster!
The plan works at first and poor Newton the centaur nearly gets strangled by his best friend. Hercules sees Helena and thinks she's a monster as well. And, well, he runs away.
One would think that Hercules would try to fight any monster he finds. I conceed that its a good thing he didn't inadvertently beat up poor Helena, but Hercules should be the last person in mythology to see a monster and say "Gee whiz, I'd better run for it."
Well, he does run. This allows Newton to trip him and dunk him into the Waters of Truth, which cures him of seeing illusions.
He attacks the invaders. Daedalus tries to stop him with a magically-summoned wall of flame, but Hercules uses Super-Breath (did he learn that from Superman, or visa versa, I wonder) to blow the flames back at the bad guys. A few more feats of super-strength and the invaders retreat, taking a stunned Daedalus with them to "fix him later" for failing to stop a demi-god.
It's another short, fun story. Like the cartoon, it sets up the premise quickly and tosses Hercules into action. The artist continues to make it all look great while effectively emulating the look of the cartoon.
But, gee whiz, Herk. You see a monster and run away? That's very un-Hercules like.
Next week, we'll take a break before diving into the second and final issue of this series. Instead, we'll visit with Richie Rich.
Suspense: "Blue Eyes" 8/29/46
A man plans to murder his wife, changes his mind, then gets accused of murdering her.
Click HERE to listen or download.
Louis L'Amour was at least as skilled in writing short stories as he was writing novels.
For instance, "Dutchman's Flat" (published in the Fall 1948 issue of Giant Western) is about five six men chasing another into the desert. The man they are chasing, Chet Lock, apparently back-shot someone. There's no formal law in the area, so the men include a rope on which to hang Lock when they catch him.
But Lock isn't easy to catch. At one point, he keeps them pinned down with rifle fire. But he doesn't kill any of them, even though he could easily have done so.
Later, he leaves marks on cliff walls to point them towards water or towards a shady area to rest their horses. He even leaves wood for a fire, salt and coffee in one location.
Is he taunting them? Or have they misjudged him? He's not acting like a killer who would shoot a man in the back.
The story is set up to allow the men to learn about Lock's character, even though they don't actually meet him until the end of the tale. The idea L'Amour brings across is that you can get a feel for who a man is by what he does. Would a man who acts like Lock does, even when being pursued by men who want to kill him, be someone who would commit cold-blooded murder?
"Dutchman's Flat" benefits from L'Amour's vivid description of the desert, presenting the landscape as oppressive and deadly, and his straightforward account of the pursuit. It's a Western adventure story, but its also a solid character study. It's worth reading.
You can find it online HERE.
Sandwiched between the two Hercules stories in Gold Key's The Mighty Hercules #1 (July 1963) is a nifty "Greek Heroes of Mythology" feature, written by Paul S. Newman and drawn by an uncredited artist. The art style, like the Hercules tales, effectively mimics the designs of the Mighty Hercules cartoon on which the comic book is based. It's a fairly safe bet the same artist drew all three stories, but we simply have no idea who he was.
Anyway, this one is about Theseus, the Greek hero who slew the Minotaur. It follows the myth closely. For years, Athens has been obligated to send seven youths and seven maids to King Minos as a tribute. The young people are then tossed in a labyrinth and eaten by the Minotaur.
Theseus, the king's son, volunteers to be one of the current tributes. Once in Crete, Minos' daughter Ariadne falls for him and gives him a sword and a ball of thread, this latter item to be used to mark his passage through the labyrinth so he can find his way out.
Theseus eventually confronts the Minotaur and slays it. Gee whiz, I didn't expect the monster design we see in a Gold Key comic! The Minotaur is given the bull head and a completely naked human body! Of course, we never see anything inappropriate, but for Gold Key, this was a risque image. The panel showing Theseus finishing off the Minotaur is pretty brutal as well.
Of course, in the end, there's nothing here a reasonable parent would object to their children reading. But I can picture a naughty six-year-old penciling in the Minotaur's wee-wee. It's what six-year-olds do.
The story ends with Theseus and Ariadne sailing back to Athens together. It leaves out the part where Theseus forgets to put up the sail that tells his dad he's alive, leading to his dad committing suicide. But, well, THAT would have been too much for Gold Key. In essence, this is a fun and effective retelling of a classic myth.
Next week, we'll finish up this issue with a look at the second Hercules Story.
FEBRUARY IS TANKS vs DINOSAURS MONTH!
Crime Club: "Mr Smith's Hat" 1/23/47
"A very intriguing story of a finger that puts its print on death."
Click HERE to listen or download.
I made the mistake of watching not just the first episode of Starfleet Academy, but the first TWO episodes in hopes that the show might not continue to be a dreadful insult to the legacy of Star Trek. Well, it is. Good heavens, its terrible.
The show's writers ignorance or indifference to how any military organization works highlights one reason the original series is still the best version of that universe. I do realize that Star Fleet is not purely military and should not be purely military--they do exploration, diplomancy, science, etc as well. But they are structued as a military organization, with ranks, traditions and all that goes with that. And they pack phasers and photon torpedoes--if we go to war with the Klingons, Star Fleet will be on the front lines.
A couple of weeks ago, we talked about the 1960s cartoon version of Hercules. I thought it might be fun to look at the two Gold Key issues adapting that cartoon to the comics. Each issue had two Hercules stories, so we'll be with the demigod for the next four weeks.
The Mighty Hercules #1 (July 1963) starts with "The Curse of the Stone Statues," written by the prolific Paul S. Newman and drawn by an uncredited artist who does a good job of emulating the look of the cartoon.
Hercules' gal, Helena, is visiting the palace of Prince Dorian, only to discover the building is full of stone statues. Apparently, Helena needs to read up on Greek Mythology--it doesn't at first occur to her that the statues are people turned into stone.
She calls for Hercules, who comes down from Olympus to investigate. Herc, at least, realizes that evil is afoot and that the statues are people. But the person responsible is not a Gorgon, but the evil wizard Daedalus, Herc's arch-enemy. He's zapped the local humans to draw Hercules into an ambush, with plans on using his "Sceptor of Medusa" on the hero, then taking over the kingdom.
Dangerous Assignment: "Nursery Rhyme" 11/26/52
A dead man leaves the first line of a nursery rhyme typed on his secretary's typewriter. Figuring out why could lead to the identity of the murderer.
Click HERE to listen or download.
The May 1934 issue of Weird Tales is justly remembered as containing Queen of the Black Coast, one of Robert E. Howard's most important Conan tales.
But there are other gems within. Clark Ashton Smith, for instance, contributed a story from his Zothique cycle: "The Tomb-Spawn."
Smith had several story cycles going during his career. The Averoigne tales were set in a fictional province in Medieval France. The Hyperborea stories were set during a pre-Ice Age civilization, full of sorcery and cosmic dread, similar to Howard's Hyborian Age in its setting.
The Zothique stories are also filled with sorcery and cosmic dread, but are set in the far future. Technological civilizationis long-gone and forgotten, replaced by magic. The Elder gods have returned. The sun is red and dying. Zothique is the last surviving continent. That last continent has a history of its own probably at least as long as contemporary mankind does now, but it still represents humanity's last gasp.
"The Tomb-Spawn," like many of these far-future tales, has Death looking over your shoulder pretty much the entire time you are reading it. Two travelers, Milab and Marabac, here a tale about an ancient sorcerer-king named Ossaru, who keeps an alien being called Nioth-Korghai in a chamber beneath his palace.
(Smith was influenced by Greek mythology in his Hyperborea tales, but there might be a bit of influence here as well, as this set-up--though not the rest of the story--reminds me slightly of the myth of Minos and the Minotaur.)
The creature was Ossaru's advisor and aide, but eventually dies from unknown causes. Later, when Ossaru also dies, he has arranged for his mummy to be lowered into the same chamber that houses the body of Nioth-Korghai is entombed, with both corpses protected by magical wards.
Millennia go by and no one now remembers where Ossaru's capital was located. But when Milab and Marabac are ambushed in the desert by cannibalistic humanoid creatures, then stumble across the ruins of that city while fleeing. In search of water, they end up in the tomb, where they find...
Well, see for yourself what they find. You can read the story online HERE. I was reminded of the story when it was featured on the excellent HorrorBabble podcast recently, so you can also listen to it being read there:
Adventures into Darkness #5 (August 1952) was the first of ten issues in that series. Often that means that it took over the numbering of another comic book after that first comic's cancellation. But in this case, the first issue was simply designated #5. It was a practice at Standard Comics to start at least some of their titles with #5, under the belief that a comic would sell better if it looked like it had been around for awhile. (A few other publishers used the same tactic.)
Numbering shenanigans aside, Adventures into Darkness is a fine example of atmospheric horror stories that would soon be sent into Comic Book Limbo by the Comics Code. One of the stories, for instance, is "Death Follows Orders," written by an uncredited writer and drawn by Jerry Grandenetti.
It's a five-pager that sets up its premise and tells its story quickly and skillfully. A French farmer and his daughter are digging a new well when they stumble across an old cellar full of dead Nazi soldiers. The men had apparently been trapped their during the war.
The officer is holding written orders and, now that the dead men are "free," they decide to follow those orders. They then march off to the nearby village to take it over. Violence follows--the Nazis might be dead, but their weapons still work.
The farmer tries to stop them, but is overwhelmed and told he'll be shot. But the daughter has noticed the Nazis are fearful of fire and guesses why. She snatches the written orders out of the Nazi officer's pocket. Her dad manages to set fire to those orders. Once the orders vanish, the Nazis collapse. They are now permanently dead.
It's an effective little story, keying off the fanatisim of hard-core Nazis, but still highlighting the heroism of those who oppose them. Grandenetti's art is effective and atmospheric.
You can read it yourself HERE.
Next week, we'll visit with Gold Key's version of the Mighty Hercules.