Wednesday, January 20, 2016
How to Make Golf Interesting.
Golf is boring. It is seriously boring. Just thinking about golf makes me hyperventilate. It's even more boring than watching paint dry, because at least there's a chance that a mysterious cosmic ray from space will hit the paint and mutate it into a sentient being that will then become my invisible magic-powered sidekick. But there's no chance at all of golf being even remotely interesting.
But in the future--ah, the future, when we'll have flying cars, jet packs and hoverboards. When our greatest achievement will be to make golf an interesting and fun game!
We learn about this in "Danger on the Martian Links," (Brave and the Bold #46--Feb/March 1964), written by John Broome and illustrated by Carmine Infantino. In the future, golf courses are laid out over dangerous areas of various planets. Golfers are required to play through no matter where the ball lies--no matter what the ball lies. If you have to fight a monster, don scuba gear or outwit aliens before you can take your next shot, then that's just the way it is.
Earth's champion golfer, Wale Marner, certainly knows this, having quite literally fought his way across golf courses on many planets.
Gee whiz, this is the way to make golf interesting! Toss in a few death traps and alien monsters and I'll watch a tournament from start to finish!
Heck, the skills Wale has to hone to be a good golfer even help save the Solar System! It's while he's playing in the big Nine Planets tournament on Mars that alien invaders land. Fortunately, a good swing with a 9-iron is just what's needed to send those pesky aliens packing.
"Danger on the Martian Links" is a fun story, with Infantino's art bringing life to a silly but entertaining concept.
Comic book stories have always had enormous value in building our sense of wonder, touching our imagination, taking us to other worlds and simply entertaining us. But this story also shows that comic books can even save the world's most uninteresting game from collapsing under the weight of its own dullness.
Next week--ROBOT DINOSAURS!